Choices

I've heard people say that life is a series of choices, and for me, right now, in this stage of life, I am totally aware of my choices.  I spend all day making lots of little choices.

For example, the baby was sleeping late this morning - yesterday was a tough day with very little napping, but she paid me back with a fantastic night's sleep - and I had a choice.  I could get out of bed and take a shower, or stay in bed and catch some extra sleep.  Since I went to bed at 9:00 last night and I hadn't showered in a few days, I chose the shower.  Good choice.

Then after the shower, I had to choose between doing my hair and eating breakfast in peace.  I chose breakfast.  Again, good choice.  My hair went crazy in the humidity outside anyways.

And now, I chose blogging over doing the dishes in the kitchen, figuring that dishes don't require focus and I could do them while the baby was awake (she's napping now).

With a baby to care for, a job to do, and a house to manage, I have seen the end of procrastination in my life.  There is no putting things off until later, because "later" is unpredictable.  All I can do is make choices about how to use the time I have right now.  This minute.  And I don't always make the right choice - staying up late to watch Friday Night Lights + baby awake early the next morning = rough day  - but I'm learning.  And most of the time, I'm really loving it :)

Times flies

I can't believe Hannah will be three months old on Sunday.  I feel like the first two months were long, but now it's like I took her two month pictures last week....and it's been a whole month.

I realized I haven't done anything really to capture her development, so I'm going to take some notes here, mostly for my own future reference, because I want to remember all of her little achievements.

So, at nearly three months, Hannah:

• Swats - this was one of her most fun early skills.  She loves to lie under her play gyms and swat at objects overhead, particularly those that make noise like clacking or rattling or jingling.
• Tracks objects - this was probably her earliest "skill".  If I hold a toy in front of her on the right, and slowly move it to the left, she follows it with her eyes.
• Sucks her fist - I don't think this is technically a skill, but since she discovered that her hands are attached to her, she has loved to put them in her mouth.  Sometimes she uses one hand to shove the other hand further in her mouth - the classic double fist.
• Grabs - she is currently honing this particular skill.  At first, she would unintentionally grab my shirt while she nursed, or my hair while I held her, but now I can hold a toy out for her, she'll reach for it, and after a few tries, she'll grab it and pull it to her mouth.  Her favorite toys are a little elephant rattle and a piece of polka dot crinkle paper.
• Smiles - I have so many pictures of her smiling, but I think some of my favorite smiles are in the morning or after a nap.  We can come to the side of her crib, say her name and "good morning" and she lights up.  I like to think that she's thinking, "Hooray, you found me!  You came for me!"
• Holds a "conversation" - she makes all kinds of noises these days, and oftentimes if I make noises or talk back to her, she'll respond with other noises like we're having a conversation.  The best time to do this is on her changing table (after she's clean of course).
• Rolls to her side - she's just starting to do this, and it's mostly in her crib before or after a nap.  Right now, she's rolling to her right side primarily.
• Superman - this is proof that tummy time is working.  She can lift her head, shoulders, and chest off the ground, while lifting her legs in the air, making her look like Superman.  She still doesn't relish tummy time, but now that she can pop her head up and look around (a big deal considering she got giant head genes from both mom and dad), she's tolerating it better.
• Sleeps through the night - she regularly gets a solid 8-9 hour block of sleep at night, usually from 8pm - 5am.  It's not every night, but it is most nights, and it is amazing.  Also, she's getting a lot better about going to bed without a fight, which makes the whole experience more fun for everyone.  Lastly, she just started sleeping in her crib at night.  As in, she did it last night for the first time.

What a big girl she is already.  On tough days or during fussy times, I try to remind myself that these days are short.  Before I know it, she'll be walking and talking and I'll miss these days when she just wants to be held.

Zzzzzz

It's been too long since I posted here - lots of pictures on the other blog, but this is where I like to take time to record my thoughts and experiences, and I haven't done that recently.

This morning, I have both the time and energy to blog here because (drumroll, please) Hannah slept through the night!  Through. The. Night.  And I mean, the whole night.

She went down at 8:00, woke up for a sleepy feeding at 9:00 and didn't wake up again until 6:30.  That's 9.5 hours baby.  My boobs were killing me but it was worth it.  I feel incredible.

I have to give a shout out to my friend Katie Boscarino for inspiring me to start changing my routines for putting her down.  First, we started her sleep routine a little earlier, so we weren't rushed.  She got a bath, a book, a boob, some rocking and a song, turned on her white noise machine and set her down, drowsy, but awake.

Normally, I'd rock her until she fell asleep, and then try to set her down as delicately as possible without waking her up.  A tough task.  This time, I just set her down, gave her a pacifier, and stepped out of the room.  When she fussed, I went back in, gave her the pacifier back (she spat it out), and left again.  She fell asleep. On her own.  Hallelujah!

Now she is down for a nap, but this nap is special, because she is in her crib for the first time.  I'm not quite ready for her to sleep in her room at night, but (again, thanks Katie) maybe if she starts napping in there sometimes, I'll start feeling better about moving her in there full time.

I have to say, I feel pretty...victorious today.  I am well rested, work is going well, the house is relatively clean, and it's Friday.  Most days are not this good, so I'm going to cherish this moment :)

So stylish

I don't typically think of myself as a very stylish person, especially these days as I face the weird reality that my regular clothes don't fit yet but my maternity clothes don't exactly fit either.  Basically, I wear a lot of yoga pants.

However, one of my mom's very kind and lovely friends gave me a Kate Spade gift card when Hannah was born - I guess she figured purses fit no matter what size you wear :)  So last week on a trip to the outlets, I stopped in to look around.  Alex stayed outside with Hannah in the stroller, but I carried the diaper bag into the store.

As I was glancing at all of the beautiful bags, a Kate Spade employee stopped me.  She says:
"I love your bag! Where did you get it?"
"Umm it's a diaper bag.  I got it at Target...I think it's made by Carters."
"Seriously?  It is so cute!  Did you get it recently?  I could use that around campus."

So although I walked out of the store without making a purchase, I still felt super stylish toting my diaper bag :)

Returning to the world

I have spent the vast majority of the past 6 weeks in our house, and most of that time with my behind on the couch holding the baby or feeding the baby or watching the baby sleep.  I do get outside every day to walk the dog, but I hadn't ventured anywhere in a car by myself until last weekend.  After those successful trips, I felt like we were on a roll, so to keep up the momentum this week, Hannah and I ventured to the grocery store, the doctor's office, AND Target!

All three trips went well - Hannah slept most of the time and only cried a little bit in the line at the grocery and in the car.  Success!

The interesting part of these trips for me though was how...disorienting it was to be out in the world again.  It felt like sensory overload - so much to look at, so many people.  I might as well have been in Times Square.

I was trying to move through the stores really quickly, which I'm sure contributed to this feeling, but I wasn't expecting to feel so...out of sorts after just six weeks.  I actually commented to Alex afterwards that the lights in Target seemed brighter than usual.  Eek.

So this is a sign.  The time has come to start figuring out our new "normal" and it cannot be limited to the walls of my house.  The weather is getting nice, the baby is getting big, and I am losing my social skills.  We have to get out more :)

Our first adventure

As I posted on our family blog, this weekend was full of adventures for Miss Hannah and me - our first track meet and our first trip to church for Easter.

What I didn't post was some of the dramatics that went on behind the scenes.

Saturday morning everything was going really well - the dog was walked, the car was loaded, the diaper bag was packed with extra outfits, lots of changing supplies, hand sanitizer...you get the idea.  I was prepared.

I got Hannah all strapped in to her car seat, jumped in the front seat and we headed out.  She was doing great, staying calm...until we hit a stoplight.  Then the wailing began.

There was no way I was going to make the 35 minutes drive to the meet with her wailing like that and completely unable to comfort her.  So, I found a parking lot, we pulled over, and I jumped in the back seat to come to her rescue.  I changed her, rocked her, got her out in the fresh air, and she fell asleep.

Until I put her back in her car seat.

This time, I wised up.  Instead of pulling her out, I pulled the whole car seat out and swung her like a (really heavy) swing next to the car.  After a few minutes of that, success!  She went to sleep and stayed asleep for the whole drive.  The whole adventure took an extra 30 minutes or so, but we made it!

Our amazing bodies

 By "our" I mean all women everywhere.  Being pregnant, and then recovering from giving birth, has given me a whole new appreciation for God's design of our bodies.  First of all, I grew a human inside of me.  A whole new person.  Who would have guessed that this:

could come out of this:

Whoa.

Second, after that seemingly impossible feat occurred, I never could have imagined how quickly my body would start to feel like my body again.  Mostly because I gained a lot of weight while I was pregnant.  A lot.  Like 45 pounds, which is exactly 10 lbs more than is "recommended" for women of average BMI before pregnancy.  I was a whale.

The amazing thing is that within two weeks, 25 of those pounds went away (well, 9 lbs came out as a baby, but you get my point), and a little more goes away every day.

Thirdly, my beautiful (big) girl is getting bigger every day eating only the food my body produces.  What an amazing system!

God really knew what he was doing when he designed women's bodies, and I have never appreciated that more than I do now!